I sit, I stare, I leave my mind, I've got no plans-
Then it comes like an unwanted guest,
making itself comfortable, growing on me,
and all the while making its presence impercptible.
It is like being in love without knowing it that you are in love,
you jump, from cliff to cliff, never looking back, no, not even once,
just going where it leads you.
Sometimes it leads you into different worlds, almost parallel worlds,
playing with you, irritating you, stimulating you, making you happy, sad, frustrated.
Making you to come to conclusion, sometimes breaking other conclusions, but all the times making you forget yourself, the world around you.
And all this time, you're under its effect almost like a drug.
And then abruptly, it wants to make itself known,
like a thief wanting to give himself over purposefully,
or is it me who wants to break it?
and then I look backward, I see it--
I see it clearly, with awe, astonishment,
I see it's trail, where it has led me, how it has led me,
the different trains it made me take to travel to the different world,
to different realms.
Suddenly I become aware, I want to pour it all, to preserve it all, so that I can completely enjoy it many times again, and again.
I then remember it all too clear, and then almost an instant of anxiety when I feel it is slipping away. I would then want to record it, however abstract it is.
And then it fades even more away, and then the fading out doubles, as the present comes back like an intruder with the many wants and pressures.
And then it fades even more away, and then the fading out triples, as someone or the other slashes my solitude like bloody murder.
And then I calm down, everything is lost,
only a remnant is left of it, that is WHAT it was-
I remember it was "The Train of Thought"
:)
